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The unseen burden patients carry between appointments

Ryan Nadelson, MD
Physician
July 28, 2025
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A man sat in my waiting room, heart racing—not from chest pain, but from panic. He’d been Googling his symptoms all night. Not afraid of what is—terrified of what might be. This is the anticipatory anxiety of modern medicine—a silent epidemic that strikes before any diagnosis ever does.

Patients no longer arrive with just symptoms. They bring stories already constructed. Hours of scrolling. Threads of worst-case scenarios. Algorithms feeding fear. By the time they reach me, they’re not just physically drained—they’re emotionally exhausted.

One patient told me, “I thought my low heart rate meant something serious. Like a rhythm issue. Maybe heart block.” It wasn’t. Just a normal variation. Nothing dangerous. But once the spiral begins, logic gets drowned out by fear.

Another stared at the floor and whispered, “I was worried you’d be disappointed… my blood pressure crept up. I tried so hard.” I was stunned. Not by the numbers—they were fine. But by the guilt. The shame. The belief they had somehow let me down.

I’ve never scolded a patient for a number. In fact, I’ve never scolded a patient at all. Because this isn’t about blame—it’s about partnership. We’re in this together. My job isn’t to grade them. It’s to guide them.

And it’s not just blood pressure. It’s A1c. That single number becomes a four-month burden—quiet, invisible, ever-present. Every bite. Every drink. Every reading. All of it feels like it counts toward one moment: Did I pass or did I fail?

The waiting becomes its own kind of suffering. We speak about these numbers clinically. Patients feel them emotionally. It’s not just the diagnosis they fear—it’s the anticipation of one. The what if. The silence between visits. The thought that something might be hiding just beneath the surface.

Even when the odds are 99 percent in their favor, that 1 percent takes over their thoughts. And that fear? It’s not irrational. It’s human. I know—because I’ve felt it too. Even as a physician, when I’m the patient, I’ve refreshed lab portals late at night. I’ve searched symptoms outside my expertise. I’ve felt that tightness in my chest while waiting. I’ve imagined the worst.

It’s not the data I fear. It’s the unknown. And that kind of anxiety isn’t limited to exam rooms. It shows up in boardrooms, classrooms, bedrooms. We fear judgment. Failure. Catastrophe. We fear disappointing the people we trust.

A student waiting for test results. A parent checking the baby monitor—for the third time. A manager rereading an email before hitting send. Same emotion. Same spiral. Same fear.

I recently saw a patient obsessing over a mild bump in her liver enzymes. “Was it the glass of wine I had the night before?” she asked. “The Tylenol I took for a headache? Could it be cancer? Or just that stomach bug I had last week?” Her mind had cycled through every possibility—common, rare, catastrophic.

The reality? A harmless, temporary blip. She didn’t need a treatment plan—she needed context. And compassion. A 60-second explanation spared her weeks of suffering. Because facts inform—but reassurance heals.

That’s why I try to set the tone the moment I walk in. I ask about their family. Their vacation. Their life. I smile. I listen. I want them to know they’re not just a lab result—they’re a person. And they’re not in trouble.

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There are days I wish I could prescribe peace of mind as easily as I prescribe blood pressure medication. But it doesn’t work that way. Peace can’t be ordered. It has to be earned—through trust, communication, and presence.

Because this is the new reality of medicine: We don’t just treat disease. We treat doubt. We treat fear. We treat the space between what could be and what actually is.

So what can we do?

  • We can listen more.
  • Explain more.
  • Judge less.
  • Normalize anxiety instead of minimizing it.
  • We can build systems that make it easier for patients to ask questions between visits.
  • Encourage messages—not just appointments.
  • Treat reassurance as part of the plan—not a distraction from it.

And above all, we can remind patients—again and again—that they’re not alone in this.

Because in an age where knowledge is everywhere, understanding is what’s missing.

In modern medicine, we don’t just treat illness. We treat the anxiety of waiting. The fear of the unknown. The quiet suffering in between.

And sometimes, the most powerful medicine we offer isn’t what we prescribe—it’s what we say.

Ryan Nadelson is chair of the Department of Internal Medicine at Northside Hospital Diagnostic Clinic in Gainesville, Georgia. Raised in a family of gastroenterologists, he chose to forge his own path in internal medicine—drawn by its complexity and the opportunity to care for the whole patient. A respected leader known for his patient-centered approach, Dr. Nadelson is deeply committed to mentoring the next generation of physicians and fostering a culture of clinical excellence and lifelong learning.

He is an established author and frequent contributor to KevinMD, where he writes about physician identity, the emotional challenges of modern practice, and the evolving role of doctors in today’s health care system.

You can connect with him on Doximity and LinkedIn.

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