Skip to content
  • About
  • Contact
  • Contribute
  • Book
  • Careers
  • Podcast
  • Recommended
  • Speaking
  • All
  • Physician
  • Practice
  • Policy
  • Finance
  • Conditions
  • .edu
  • Patient
  • Meds
  • Tech
  • Social
  • Video
    • All
    • Physician
    • Practice
    • Policy
    • Finance
    • Conditions
    • .edu
    • Patient
    • Meds
    • Tech
    • Social
    • Video
    • About
    • Contact
    • Contribute
    • Book
    • Careers
    • Podcast
    • Recommended
    • Speaking

7 tips to stay away from misery on vacation

Ronan Kavanagh, MD
Physician
September 7, 2013
Share
Tweet
Share

This year my wife and I decided to compile a list of all of the holidays we’ve had since we had kids. Its a nice list and we’re lucky to have traveled as well as we have.

I always get excited about going. There’s the anticipation of downtime away from work (and other peoples’ problems), time for relaxation, sleeping, eating, reading, and some quality time with my family. Life is just going to be better on holidays. I just know it is going to be. Of course it is.

But as Robert Louis Stephenson said , “It is better to travel hopefully than to arrive.”

A few days after my arrival, I eventually “land.” My initial holiday euphoria is fairly predictably replaced by a familiar funk of low mood, anhedonia, irritability and impatience. I am, as my wife often reminds me (usually after the event — I am usually far too irritable to receive criticism at that stage) difficult to be around. Although the mood inevitably lifts, it has spoils a few otherwise perfectly good family holidays.

A few of my friends have confided similar experiences. A spouse of one of them even suggested that we all (“the miserables”) all go a way for a few days and be fed up together instead of inflicting ourselves on our respective families.

Whereas it is well recognized that those prone to low moods in the darker months don’t like Christmas holidays much but there is very little written about why middle aged men get depressed in up market resorts in Portugal.

I have come to the conclusion that we doctors are a bit like actors and other performers: we thrive well in an environment of high drama where there’s adulation on offer and can become quite dependent on it. Without the warm balm of that appreciative audience (families can find it hard to sustain adulation for anything more than a few days), a certain emptiness can take hold and whatever the “emotional dust” we may have swept under the carpet between holidays tends to become visible.

Over the last few years though I have developed some tricks to reduce the feeling and to cope better with it when it comes. I think I’ve got it cracked.

1. Don’t expect your holidays to make you happy. Live your life as it happens, seeking enjoyment and relaxation on a day to day basis and don’t save it up for a few weeks in the sun every August. It sounds trite but its true. I’ve found meditation great in this regard. It allows you take a holiday from yourself, every day.

2. Adjusting to a high pressure environment of work to the low pressure environment of holidays should be done gradually — like a diver resurfacing trying to avoid the bends. Although its hard, try not to overdo it work wise in the week before you go. If possible spend a few days at home before you jump on a plane or pack the car up.

3. Avoid the temptation to overbook the first few days after you come back. Adjusting from high pressure to low pressure can be hard but the reverse is even harder. The anticipation of knowing that you’re about to return to a crazy schedule can spoil the end of your holiday.

4. Disconnect from all forms of communication. I either bring a disposable pay as you go phone or set my phone up to only receive calls from family members. No email, no social media, no Internet browsing. Read some fiction and avoid all forms of reading that will return your mind to the workplace. This allows the problem solving side of your brain a chance to recover.

5. Try and take it easy on the booze — you may feel like rewarding yourself with a few extra drinks (especially on the first few evenings) but this only worsens the land when it comes.

ADVERTISEMENT

6. Try and give yourself a daily holiday routine as doctors (and other workaholics) don’t do well with unstructured time. For me it involves getting up early and having some time to myself before the family wakes, a light breakfast followed by some exercise. Knowing that you will have some protected time for yourself will also can help you cope with the demands of the childcare later. Which you’ll definitely get asked to do if you’ve done all of the above.

7. If you begin to feel low, don’t panic. For those of us who have experienced clinical depression the feeling can be particularly frightening as it may be reminiscent of previous episodes. Let yourself fall and reassure yourself that the feeling is likely to be temporary. It will pass (all the usual advice about attending your own doctor applies if it doesn’t).

If you already enjoy your holidays and cannot identify with any of the above, I’m happy for you. But spare a thought for the sad looking guy at the pool bar. And tell him to take it easy on the booze.

Ronan Kavanagh is a rheumatologist who blogs at Dr. Ronan Kavanagh’s Blog.

Prev

When should insurance cover body contouring?

September 7, 2013 Kevin 25
…
Next

Urging doctors to take responsibility for their mistakes

September 8, 2013 Kevin 14
…

Tagged as: Psychiatry

Post navigation

< Previous Post
When should insurance cover body contouring?
Next Post >
Urging doctors to take responsibility for their mistakes

ADVERTISEMENT

More by Ronan Kavanagh, MD

  • a desk with keyboard and ipad with the kevinmd logo

    Dealing with depression has made me a better doctor

    Ronan Kavanagh, MD
  • a desk with keyboard and ipad with the kevinmd logo

    An unexpected second opinion for rheumatoid arthritis

    Ronan Kavanagh, MD
  • a desk with keyboard and ipad with the kevinmd logo

    Why rheumatology is sexy

    Ronan Kavanagh, MD

More in Physician

  • How New Mexico became a malpractice lawsuit hotspot

    Patrick Hudson, MD
  • Why compassion—not credentials—defines great doctors

    Dr. Saad S. Alshohaib
  • Why Canada is losing its skilled immigrant doctors

    Olumuyiwa Bamgbade, MD
  • Why doctors are reclaiming control from burnout culture

    Maureen Gibbons, MD
  • Why screening for diseases you might have can backfire

    Andy Lazris, MD and Alan Roth, DO
  • Why “do no harm” might be harming modern medicine

    Sabooh S. Mubbashar, MD
  • Most Popular

  • Past Week

    • Why are medical students turning away from primary care? [PODCAST]

      The Podcast by KevinMD | Podcast
    • Here’s what providers really need in a modern EHR

      Laura Kohlhagen, MD, MBA | Tech
    • Why “do no harm” might be harming modern medicine

      Sabooh S. Mubbashar, MD | Physician
    • Why doctors are reclaiming control from burnout culture

      Maureen Gibbons, MD | Physician
    • How community paramedicine impacts Indigenous elders

      Noah Weinberg | Conditions
    • A physician’s reflection on love, loss, and finding meaning in grief [PODCAST]

      The Podcast by KevinMD | Podcast
  • Past 6 Months

    • Why are medical students turning away from primary care? [PODCAST]

      The Podcast by KevinMD | Podcast
    • Why tracking cognitive load could save doctors and patients

      Hiba Fatima Hamid | Education
    • Why “do no harm” might be harming modern medicine

      Sabooh S. Mubbashar, MD | Physician
    • Here’s what providers really need in a modern EHR

      Laura Kohlhagen, MD, MBA | Tech
    • What the world must learn from the life and death of Hind Rajab

      Saba Qaiser, RN | Conditions
    • How medical culture hides burnout in plain sight

      Marco Benítez | Conditions
  • Recent Posts

    • A physician’s reflection on love, loss, and finding meaning in grief [PODCAST]

      The Podcast by KevinMD | Podcast
    • How fragmented records and poor tracking degrade patient outcomes

      Michael R. McGuire | Policy
    • How New Mexico became a malpractice lawsuit hotspot

      Patrick Hudson, MD | Physician
    • How I learned to stop worrying and love AI

      Rajeev Dutta | Education
    • Understanding depression beyond biology: the power of therapy and meaning

      Maire Daugharty, MD | Conditions
    • Why compassion—not credentials—defines great doctors

      Dr. Saad S. Alshohaib | Physician

Subscribe to KevinMD and never miss a story!

Get free updates delivered free to your inbox.


Find jobs at
Careers by KevinMD.com

Search thousands of physician, PA, NP, and CRNA jobs now.

Learn more

View 7 Comments >

Founded in 2004 by Kevin Pho, MD, KevinMD.com is the web’s leading platform where physicians, advanced practitioners, nurses, medical students, and patients share their insight and tell their stories.

Social

  • Like on Facebook
  • Follow on Twitter
  • Connect on Linkedin
  • Subscribe on Youtube
  • Instagram

ADVERTISEMENT

  • Most Popular

  • Past Week

    • Why are medical students turning away from primary care? [PODCAST]

      The Podcast by KevinMD | Podcast
    • Here’s what providers really need in a modern EHR

      Laura Kohlhagen, MD, MBA | Tech
    • Why “do no harm” might be harming modern medicine

      Sabooh S. Mubbashar, MD | Physician
    • Why doctors are reclaiming control from burnout culture

      Maureen Gibbons, MD | Physician
    • How community paramedicine impacts Indigenous elders

      Noah Weinberg | Conditions
    • A physician’s reflection on love, loss, and finding meaning in grief [PODCAST]

      The Podcast by KevinMD | Podcast
  • Past 6 Months

    • Why are medical students turning away from primary care? [PODCAST]

      The Podcast by KevinMD | Podcast
    • Why tracking cognitive load could save doctors and patients

      Hiba Fatima Hamid | Education
    • Why “do no harm” might be harming modern medicine

      Sabooh S. Mubbashar, MD | Physician
    • Here’s what providers really need in a modern EHR

      Laura Kohlhagen, MD, MBA | Tech
    • What the world must learn from the life and death of Hind Rajab

      Saba Qaiser, RN | Conditions
    • How medical culture hides burnout in plain sight

      Marco Benítez | Conditions
  • Recent Posts

    • A physician’s reflection on love, loss, and finding meaning in grief [PODCAST]

      The Podcast by KevinMD | Podcast
    • How fragmented records and poor tracking degrade patient outcomes

      Michael R. McGuire | Policy
    • How New Mexico became a malpractice lawsuit hotspot

      Patrick Hudson, MD | Physician
    • How I learned to stop worrying and love AI

      Rajeev Dutta | Education
    • Understanding depression beyond biology: the power of therapy and meaning

      Maire Daugharty, MD | Conditions
    • Why compassion—not credentials—defines great doctors

      Dr. Saad S. Alshohaib | Physician

MedPage Today Professional

An Everyday Health Property Medpage Today
  • Terms of Use | Disclaimer
  • Privacy Policy
  • DMCA Policy
All Content © KevinMD, LLC
Site by Outthink Group

7 tips to stay away from misery on vacation
7 comments

Comments are moderated before they are published. Please read the comment policy.

Loading Comments...