Courtney Markham-Abedi, MD
Conditions
Both lay dabblers and scholars of history repeatedly admonish us that history repeats itself. Historical context can help us understand and grapple with issues that have plagued and continue to plague humankind. The United States is not alone in having…
Both lay dabblers and scholars of history repeatedly admonish us that history repeats itself. Historical context can help us understand and grapple with issues that have plagued and continue to plague humankind.
The United States is not alone in having a dubious record of misogyny and glaring inequities in the treatment of women and people of color. In recent decades, people have re-examined historical teachings through the lens of human rights, …
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Maternal mental illness is still judged like witchcraft
Conditions
For the past month and maybe longer, I have been waking up with pressure in my chest. It worsened in December and continued to worsen in the new year. I had identified it as anxiety, but felt it was of…
For the past month and maybe longer, I have been waking up with pressure in my chest. It worsened in December and continued to worsen in the new year. I had identified it as anxiety, but felt it was of a different quality than my run-of-the-mill anxiety. This feeling was more anguished.
During the first week of January, I volunteered at a clinic, where I saw patients, assessed, and treated psychiatric …
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The “ethical canary”: How moral injury signals systemic failure
Physicians
I put it on one night among tears and grief. It slid onto my skin like butter, like it was meant for me. It hugged my torso and clung to all the wrong places. The truth is, I had worn…
I put it on one night among tears and grief. It slid onto my skin like butter, like it was meant for me. It hugged my torso and clung to all the wrong places. The truth is, I had worn it before. I am unsure exactly when I last stopped wearing it. Unlike the donning of the letter, the removal is much quieter. I probably did not realize exactly when …
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A psychiatrist’s scarlet letter of shame
Physicians
My children's Montessori teacher lost her son to suicide several years ago. When I heard of her son's death, memories came flooding back. I recalled Tom's upper school project in which he presented a hoverboard. This inspired much reverence and…
My children’s Montessori teacher lost her son to suicide several years ago. When I heard of her son’s death, memories came flooding back. I recalled Tom’s upper school project in which he presented a hoverboard. This inspired much reverence and awe in my son, who later attempted the same. Tom’s mother had tended to my daughter’s bumps and scrapes on the playground and helped her learn phonics. I gathered the …
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How showing up teaches children about grief and empathy
Physicians
It's capitalism, it's greed, it's the hospitals, it's all those things, but for me, it's sadness, it's loss, it's crying myself to sleep. Lest I sound ungrateful, I am appreciative of the income and career it has afforded me. I…
It’s capitalism, it’s greed, it’s the hospitals, it’s all those things, but for me, it’s sadness, it’s loss, it’s crying myself to sleep. Lest I sound ungrateful, I am appreciative of the income and career it has afforded me. I am not the victim but also not the perpetrator. In reality, we are all both at one time or another.
It’s the hushed calls to let me know a dear patient …
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Doctors reveal the unspoken toll of shame and sacrifice in medicine
Conditions
They died by suicide—that is the politically correct way to say it. I want to be politically correct, but I am not sure words can dampen the impact. Someone just lost a friend, a son, a partner, a child. Somehow,…
They died by suicide—that is the politically correct way to say it. I want to be politically correct, but I am not sure words can dampen the impact. Someone just lost a friend, a son, a partner, a child. Somehow, we believe if we say the words prettily, it takes the sting away—it doesn’t. No matter how you say it, they left the world today, or yesterday, or whatever day …
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When words aren’t enough: the heartbreaking truth about suicide
Conditions
At the beginning of a career – sometimes when viewed through rose-colored glasses not yet spoiled by reality - you hope to be able to lose loss to stay away. Somehow you feel like if you just try hard enough…
At the beginning of a career – sometimes when viewed through rose-colored glasses not yet spoiled by reality – you hope to be able to lose loss to stay away. Somehow you feel like if you just try hard enough – practice psychiatry in the best way possible you can somehow prevent death by suicide. This is obviously magical thinking, and you begin to realize that there will be a …
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The many losses of a long psychiatry career
Policy
I was faced with a stark question—one that, though I have spoken openly about women’s rights, somehow I had not distilled into the succinct question posed by a coming-of-age woman living and attempting to digest our country’s policies. Simply put:…
I was faced with a stark question—one that, though I have spoken openly about women’s rights, somehow I had not distilled into the succinct question posed by a coming-of-age woman living and attempting to digest our country’s policies. Simply put: “Mom, so they don’t care if women die?”
Oof! For a person who has a plethora of words for almost anything, I was caught off guard. My first instinct was to …
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Do they care if women die? Exploring women’s rights.
Conditions
The sitcom Friends was a cultural phenomenon that produced waves of nostalgia in those of us who came of age in the late 90s and early 2000s. The decade it was on spanned the era of transition from landlines to…
The sitcom Friends was a cultural phenomenon that produced waves of nostalgia in those of us who came of age in the late 90s and early 2000s. The decade it was on spanned the era of transition from landlines to cell phones and the advent of the internet as we know it. The characters were relatable and adored by so many.
The news of Matthew Perry’s death was a shock to …
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Matthew Perry’s enduring impact: Advocating for substance use disorder awareness and treatment
Policy
I started my career at a state hospital but transitioned to a VA hospital in 2007. I had been a resident at the hospital and was familiar with the unit and population. The unit had 19 beds, and typically these…
I started my career at a state hospital but transitioned to a VA hospital in 2007. I had been a resident at the hospital and was familiar with the unit and population. The unit had 19 beds, and typically these were filled. Often, admissions were for crisis stabilization due to suicidal ideation, and recidivism was very high. Typically, an unmet need other than psychiatric care was being addressed in many …
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Lessons from VA hospitals: Meeting basic needs improves wellbeing
Conditions
The recent case of Lindsay Clancy has weighed heavily on my heart over the past several days. According to her husband, she was a young mother who was suffering from postpartum depression or psychosis and receiving treatment in an intensive…
The recent case of Lindsay Clancy has weighed heavily on my heart over the past several days. According to her husband, she was a young mother who was suffering from postpartum depression or psychosis and receiving treatment in an intensive outpatient program. She allegedly took her children’s lives and tried to end her own life.
The DSM 5-TR nomenclature for this condition is peripartum onset, referring to mood onset during pregnancy …
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Postpartum depression or psychosis: Understanding the reality behind Lindsay Clancy’s story
Physicians
I'm saddened to hear of the passing of Stephen "Twitch" Boss. He was a talented DJ and dancer who brought joy to many with his infectious personality and smile. He will be remembered for his incredible talent and the joy…
I’m saddened to hear of the passing of Stephen “Twitch” Boss. He was a talented DJ and dancer who brought joy to many with his infectious personality and smile. He will be remembered for his incredible talent and the joy he brought to those around him. He leaves behind his wife and three children.
The truth is that psychiatry is a challenging …
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Remembering Twitch: a star who shone bright
Physicians
As we are all processing the horrific events that occurred in Texas, as a psychiatrist and advocate for individuals suffering from mental illness, I beg you not to state this individual was mentally ill. We do not know enough information…
As we are all processing the horrific events that occurred in Texas, as a psychiatrist and advocate for individuals suffering from mental illness, I beg you not to state this individual was mentally ill. We do not know enough information to come to this conclusion.
We know that individuals with mental illness are not more violent than peers without mental illness. We need to lean into the research, look at other …
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It’s time for evidence-based change to reduce gun violence
Conditions
In a world where we are constantly bombarded with bad news, it is easy to forget the manner in which news is reported can impact and cause harm to vulnerable individuals. The topic of suicide is one such sensitive subject,…
In a world where we are constantly bombarded with bad news, it is easy to forget the manner in which news is reported can impact and cause harm to vulnerable individuals. The topic of suicide is one such sensitive subject, and there are guidelines for the appropriate reporting of deaths by suicide to help mitigate potential risk. Despite these guidelines, sensationalized stories about death by suicide are often splashed across …
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How the Judd family has honored their mother
Physicians
I have always been a lover of words. Confusingly, I have found myself unable to define words that I would have easily been able to describe a decade ago. Due to a more weighty examination of cultural and social constructs,…
I have always been a lover of words. Confusingly, I have found myself unable to define words that I would have easily been able to describe a decade ago. Due to a more weighty examination of cultural and social constructs, I am now left scratching my head thinking about how to define previously simple words like woman and mother.
When posed with the question, “When did you become a mother,” I …
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The matriarchy is all around us, but I feel it most in the practice of medicine
Physicians
New Haven, West Virginia, is a small town nestled in Appalachia and located approximately eight miles from the juncture of the Ohio and Kanawha rivers. Newspaper articles from the 1950s and '60s suggest that the town's demographic makeup and surrounding…
New Haven, West Virginia, is a small town nestled in Appalachia and located approximately eight miles from the juncture of the Ohio and Kanawha rivers. Newspaper articles from the 1950s and ’60s suggest that the town’s demographic makeup and surrounding area as nearly 97 percent Caucasian.
In 1926, as commissioned by West Virginia, a psychiatric facility was opened and named The Lakin Hospital for the Colored Insane. In the tradition of …
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Mildred Mitchell-Bateman, MD: an icon in psychiatry
Conditions
"Anything that's human is mentionable, and anything that is mentionable can be more manageable." - Fred Rogers Cheslie Kryst, a former Miss USA, lawyer, and entertainment correspondent, died by suicide. She was smart, beautiful, accomplished, and young. A police officer…
“Anything that’s human is mentionable, and anything that is mentionable can be more manageable.”
– Fred Rogers
Cheslie Kryst, a former Miss USA, lawyer, and entertainment correspondent, died by suicide. She was smart, beautiful, accomplished, and young.
A police officer was quoted saying, “Not only beautiful but she was smart — she was a lawyer … she has a life that anyone would be jealous of. It’s so sad.”
The message about suicide continues …
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What can we learn from Cheslie Kryst?
Physicians
When the term white supremacy culture is used, people get uncomfortable — they picture the skinhead as the prototypical racist. And while those people are dangerous, whether by their openly racist views being broadcast or in other subtle ways, they…
When the term white supremacy culture is used, people get uncomfortable — they picture the skinhead as the prototypical racist. And while those people are dangerous, whether by their openly racist views being broadcast or in other subtle ways, they are largely recognizable.
White supremacy culture is inescapable in the United States. We have been saturated in it. Our country was founded on its tenants. The far more dangerous racist is …
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Racism in medicine much more than just overt
Conditions
I enter the breast care center, check in, and take a seat. Though there are few people in the room; there is a sense of dread and trepidation that hangs in the air. It feels almost like a sacred space…
I enter the breast care center, check in, and take a seat. Though there are few people in the room; there is a sense of dread and trepidation that hangs in the air. It feels almost like a sacred space as I am acutely aware of all the prayers, meditations, and laments that have been spoken in this room whether aloud or silently. I can imagine behests to God, Jesus, …
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Until next year, breast care center
Physicians
When I started my career 15 years ago, I naively said I would like a job where there aren’t a lot of politics. Little did I know that my job and profession would be so strongly affected by national politics…
When I started my career 15 years ago, I naively said I would like a job where there aren’t a lot of politics. Little did I know that my job and profession would be so strongly affected by national politics a decade and a half later.
I study human behavior and can usually conceptualize behaviors fairly easily. I have been stumped in the past four months. Truly stumped. Four months ago, …
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I am not asking you to do anything my family and I haven’t done
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