M.D.O.D.: “It would be less painful to gouge my eyeballs out than to sign endless prescription refills, notes from specialists who have consulted on my patients, disability forms for people who don’t really deserve disability benefits, forms for diabetic shoes, electric scooters, walkers, canes, prior-authorizations for drugs, FMLA forms, and nursing home orders. Of course, most of these forms require rummaging through the patient’s chart for a few minutes to confirm diagnoses, last visit dates, current medications . . . When you get home at 7pm – 8pm, you get to answer your pager all night from patients who think they just might die by morning if they don’t interrupt your dinner and bedtime with your wife and kids. Then, every two weeks you collect a check which is, in general, the lowest pay in the medical field. This is the life of the primary care provider.”