Skip to content
  • About
  • Contact
  • Contribute
  • Book
  • Careers
  • Podcast
  • Recommended
  • Speaking
KevinMD
  • All
  • Physician
  • Practice
  • Policy
  • Finance
  • Conditions
  • .edu
  • Patient
  • Meds
  • Tech
  • Social
  • Video
  • All
  • Physician
  • Practice
  • Policy
  • Finance
  • Conditions
  • .edu
  • Patient
  • Meds
  • Tech
  • Social
  • Video
    • All
    • Physician
    • Practice
    • Policy
    • Finance
    • Conditions
    • .edu
    • Patient
    • Meds
    • Tech
    • Social
    • Video
    • About
    • Contact
    • Contribute
    • Book
    • Careers
    • Podcast
    • Recommended
    • Speaking
KevinMD
  • All
  • Physician
  • Practice
  • Policy
  • Finance
  • Conditions
  • .edu
  • Patient
  • Meds
  • Tech
  • Social
  • Video
    • All
    • Physician
    • Practice
    • Policy
    • Finance
    • Conditions
    • .edu
    • Patient
    • Meds
    • Tech
    • Social
    • Video
    • About
    • Contact
    • Contribute
    • Book
    • Careers
    • Podcast
    • Recommended
    • Speaking
  • About KevinMD | Kevin Pho, MD
  • Be heard on social media’s leading physician voice
  • Contact Kevin
  • Discounted enhanced author page
  • DMCA Policy
  • Establishing, Managing, and Protecting Your Online Reputation: A Social Media Guide for Physicians and Medical Practices
  • Group vs. individual disability insurance for doctors: pros and cons
  • KevinMD influencer opportunities
  • Opinion and commentary by KevinMD
  • Physician burnout speakers to keynote your conference
  • Physician Coaching by KevinMD
  • Physician keynote speaker: Kevin Pho, MD
  • Physician Speaking by KevinMD: a boutique speakers bureau
  • Primary care physician in Nashua, NH | Kevin Pho, MD
  • Privacy Policy
  • Recommended services by KevinMD
  • Terms of Use Agreement
  • Thank you for subscribing to KevinMD
  • Thank you for upgrading to the KevinMD enhanced author page
  • The biggest mistake doctors make when purchasing disability insurance
  • The doctor’s guide to disability insurance: short-term vs. long-term
  • The KevinMD ToolKit
  • Upgrade to the KevinMD enhanced author page
  • Why own-occupation disability insurance is a must for doctors

Maintaining private space when patients share trying times with you

Yann Meunier, MD
Physician
April 8, 2011
Share
Tweet
Share

Year: 1987

Setting: Pitie-Salpetriere Hospital in Paris, France
Position: Specialist in tropical diseases

I am a consultant in tropical diseases at the Pitie-Salpetriere Hospital in Paris in professor Marc Gentilini’s department, which has been receiving HIV/AIDS patients from all parts of the world since the onset of the pandemic.

Indeed, in the early days most patients came from Haiti and Africa and were seen primarily in tropical disease departments because of their geographical origin. Now famous international stars, such as Rock Hudson and Rudolph Nureyev, seek treatment on our premises and at the Pasteur Institute, which works closely with the hospital. In 1982, one of the patients of Dr. Willy Rozenbaum had a lymph node biopsied and sent to the Pasteur Institute where professor Luc Montagnier and his team identified the virus causing AIDS, which ultimately came to be known as the human immunodeficiency virus. In 2008, he and Francoise Barre-Sinoussi were awarded the Nobel Prize in Medicine for this breakthrough achievement.

One of my patients is a bisexual fashion designer in his mid-30s. He tells me about his past pleasures, attending colorful and extravagant parties on yachts belonging to billionaires in the Greek islands. He is happy to share the best moments of his life with me, and enjoys reminiscing. As he recounts with great details these experiences, I sometimes contrast the excitement in his voice with the poorness of his diagnosis, and I face my own conflicting feelings of joy and sadness on his behalf. Nevertheless, I try to live in the moment with him and I pay close attention to the descriptions that he provides. His current girlfriend sometimes comes with him and also tells me how she is doing. Over time, we witness the progressive physical and psychological downward spiral that leads her boyfriend to his death.

In the aftermath of the burial, she is despondent and keeps in touch with me at the hospital. One day she asks for my personal phone number, which I give to her. In the ensuing weeks her morale goes further down and she frequently calls me at night because she cannot sleep. This taxing relationship continues until she finally heeds my advice and begins seeing a psychiatrist when she starts to have suicidal thoughts. He treats her successfully. Though I am pleased with her outcome, I wonder whether I should have given her my home phone number in the first place.

Lesson for the doctor: Maintaining a private space can be difficult when patients share trying times with you. Hard choices must be made, but the patient’s best interests should always prevail.

Yann Meunier is the health promotion manager for the Stanford Prevention Research Center who blogs at Scope at the Stanford University School of Medicine.

Submit a guest post and be heard on social media’s leading physician voice.

Prev

The FDA does not approve the uses of drugs

April 8, 2011 Kevin 5
…
Next

Becoming the official caregiver to your sick parent

April 8, 2011 Kevin 5
…

Tagged as: Patients

< Previous Post
The FDA does not approve the uses of drugs
Next Post >
Becoming the official caregiver to your sick parent

ADVERTISEMENT

More by Yann Meunier, MD

  • a desk with keyboard and ipad with the kevinmd logo

    Always treat your patient with compassion

    Yann Meunier, MD
  • a desk with keyboard and ipad with the kevinmd logo

    You cannot treat a patient against his will

    Yann Meunier, MD
  • a desk with keyboard and ipad with the kevinmd logo

    Frustration when a government does not provide the necessary health care

    Yann Meunier, MD

More in Physician

  • First-generation physician: Navigating the first attending contract

    Sagar Chapagain, MD
  • Workplace boundaries: How to stop answering e-mails at 5 p.m.

    Yekaterina Angelova, MD
  • The lost art of connection: Why medicine needs to slow down

    Dean Robosa, MD
  • The health care economic crisis: Why the system is failing in 2026

    Harry Severance, MD
  • Clinical communication skills: the power of structured language

    Alan P. Feren, MD
  • The 9 laws of health care quality: Why metrics miss the point

    Constantine Ioannou, MD
  • Most Popular

  • Past Week

    • The dangers of vertical integration in health care

      Stephanie Waggel, MD | Policy
    • The 9 laws of health care quality: Why metrics miss the point

      Constantine Ioannou, MD | Physician
    • Why does sex work seem like a more viable path than medicine in 2026?

      Corina Fratila, MD | Physician
    • The quiet paradox of physician mental health and medication

      Timothy Lesaca, MD | Physician
    • Navigating the patchwork of CME requirements by state

      Vladislav Tchatalbachev, MD | Physician
    • Securing physician autonomy with employer-sponsored direct primary care

      Dana Y. Lujan, MBA | Physician
  • Past 6 Months

    • Missed diagnosis visceral leishmaniasis: a tragedy of note bloat

      Arthur Lazarus, MD, MBA | Conditions
    • Menstrual health in medicine: Addressing the gender gap in care

      Cynthia Kumaran | Conditions
    • The dangers of vertical integration in health care

      Stephanie Waggel, MD | Policy
    • The 9 laws of health care quality: Why metrics miss the point

      Constantine Ioannou, MD | Physician
    • Why does sex work seem like a more viable path than medicine in 2026?

      Corina Fratila, MD | Physician
    • From Singapore to Canada: a blueprint for primary care transformation

      Ivy Oandasan, MD | Policy
  • Recent Posts

    • Wellness requires safe spaces outside the medical system [PODCAST]

      The Podcast by KevinMD | Podcast
    • First-generation physician: Navigating the first attending contract

      Sagar Chapagain, MD | Physician
    • Workplace boundaries: How to stop answering e-mails at 5 p.m.

      Yekaterina Angelova, MD | Physician
    • Lowercase PTSD: Why emergency staff are still hypervigilant

      Amy Dinaburg, RN | Conditions
    • Improving tobacco treatment in clinical practice

      Edward Anselm, MD | Conditions
    • The mouth as a gateway: Why oral health matters for physicians

      David Wadler, DDS and Neil Baum, MD | Conditions

Subscribe to KevinMD and never miss a story!

Get free updates delivered free to your inbox.


Find jobs at
Careers by KevinMD.com

Search thousands of physician, PA, NP, and CRNA jobs now.

Learn more

View 2 Comments >

Founded in 2004 by Kevin Pho, MD, KevinMD.com is the web’s leading platform where physicians, advanced practitioners, nurses, medical students, and patients share their insight and tell their stories.

Social

  • Like on Facebook
  • Follow on Twitter
  • Connect on Linkedin
  • Subscribe on Youtube
  • Instagram

ADVERTISEMENT

  • Most Popular

  • Past Week

    • The dangers of vertical integration in health care

      Stephanie Waggel, MD | Policy
    • The 9 laws of health care quality: Why metrics miss the point

      Constantine Ioannou, MD | Physician
    • Why does sex work seem like a more viable path than medicine in 2026?

      Corina Fratila, MD | Physician
    • The quiet paradox of physician mental health and medication

      Timothy Lesaca, MD | Physician
    • Navigating the patchwork of CME requirements by state

      Vladislav Tchatalbachev, MD | Physician
    • Securing physician autonomy with employer-sponsored direct primary care

      Dana Y. Lujan, MBA | Physician
  • Past 6 Months

    • Missed diagnosis visceral leishmaniasis: a tragedy of note bloat

      Arthur Lazarus, MD, MBA | Conditions
    • Menstrual health in medicine: Addressing the gender gap in care

      Cynthia Kumaran | Conditions
    • The dangers of vertical integration in health care

      Stephanie Waggel, MD | Policy
    • The 9 laws of health care quality: Why metrics miss the point

      Constantine Ioannou, MD | Physician
    • Why does sex work seem like a more viable path than medicine in 2026?

      Corina Fratila, MD | Physician
    • From Singapore to Canada: a blueprint for primary care transformation

      Ivy Oandasan, MD | Policy
  • Recent Posts

    • Wellness requires safe spaces outside the medical system [PODCAST]

      The Podcast by KevinMD | Podcast
    • First-generation physician: Navigating the first attending contract

      Sagar Chapagain, MD | Physician
    • Workplace boundaries: How to stop answering e-mails at 5 p.m.

      Yekaterina Angelova, MD | Physician
    • Lowercase PTSD: Why emergency staff are still hypervigilant

      Amy Dinaburg, RN | Conditions
    • Improving tobacco treatment in clinical practice

      Edward Anselm, MD | Conditions
    • The mouth as a gateway: Why oral health matters for physicians

      David Wadler, DDS and Neil Baum, MD | Conditions

MedPage Today Professional

An Everyday Health Property Medpage Today

Copyright © 2026 KevinMD.com | Powered by Astra WordPress Theme

  • Terms of Use | Disclaimer
  • Privacy Policy
  • DMCA Policy
All Content © KevinMD, LLC
Site by Outthink Group

Maintaining private space when patients share trying times with you
2 comments

Comments are moderated before they are published. Please read the comment policy.

Loading Comments...