I had a mini epiphany recently. I realized there are three basic categories of time:

• Productive: many work tasks (but not all), completing a task at home, achieving a specific personal or professional goal.
• Non-productive and enriching: sleep, physical activity, being fully present with friends and family, learning something new.
• Non-productive, non-enriching, and pleasurable: Netflix bingeing, drinking another glass of wine, zoning out, going down a social media rabbit hole, …

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I’ve recently been intrigued by this question: Are you giving from extra or essence?

In many respects, giving from one’s essence is what burnout is all about. Your energy reserves (emotional, physical, mental, cognitive) are heading rapidly toward empty. Because of a mismatch between the energy drain from internal and external stressors and the ability to replenish your energy, you are left depleted.

I see this mismatch daily in the physicians whom …

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I recently returned from a truly magical trip to Iceland. While there, my husband and I hiked, ate wonderful food, and soaked in a different culture.

On day five of six, we ventured out to find what was described as a “hot springs river,” a body of water fed equally by glacier melt and geothermal hot springs. As a floating enthusiast, this was a must-see for me.

We hiked for an hour, …

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“If you tell me how you get your feeling of importance, I’ll tell you what you are. That determines your character. That is the most significant thing about you.”
– Dale Carnegie, How to Make Friends and Influence People

We all want to feel seen, recognized, and appreciated. That’s human nature. But where do you get your feeling of importance? What aspects of yourself are essential to who you are and how …

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I recently attended a three-day workshop on how to lead transformational workshops. The experience was both meta and genuinely transformational, and a number of the lessons I took away continue to stand out for me.

Safety comes first. The workshop leaders highlighted over and over again that psychological safety comes first. You cannot belong to a group if you do not feel safe. They created the prerequisites for safety and then …

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“If you are reluctant to ask the way, you will be lost.”
– Malay proverb

When I was struggling with burnout during training, I did not seek help.

Even when called into the office of the revered, stately, totally intimidating chair of the department, because he had “heard I was having trouble coping.”

Nope. I saw that as a sign that I needed to do a better job of hiding my lack of coping.

When …

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I’ve been working with women physicians intensively now for six years, and I’ve noticed a few things.

The women I work with are amazing. They are altruistic and caring. They are resilient, independent, and able to put others’ needs before their own. They are smart, detail-oriented, and care about getting things right.

If you’re a patient (and we all are at some point), this is exactly what you want in your doctor. …

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I’ve had a few moments in my life where time seems to stand still.

I’m not talking about being in the flow of creativity or about a near-death experience. I’m referring to those times where a sudden realization makes you reconsider how you’ve viewed yourself or your life in fundamental ways.

After leaving clinical practice, I was dogged by guilt and shame for at least a decade. I viewed my choice as …

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Here’s something you may already know. I didn’t until recently, but I sure do now, and it’s a lesson I won’t forget—something I wish I’d known three weeks ago.

Rabbits love cone flowers.

We recently downsized to a cute house with window boxes. I’ve never had window boxes before and am honestly not much of a gardener. I went to the local place where we buy plants and picked out some tall …

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Intriguing question: What is one word that can free us?

You might think it is love.

Love is so powerful in lifting shame, sadness, and loneliness, but that’s not the kind of freedom I’m referring to. Instead, I’m referring to the freedom to put aside others’ presumed or verbalized expectations of us and do something in our own best interest.

That magical word is “could.” At first glance, this might not seem like …

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This summer, my cousin Cindy has been raising Monarch butterflies. Two weeks ago, when I was visiting her for the weekend, she gave me a chrysalis to bring home. She’d already done the bulk of the work, feeding and caring for the caterpillar. I left with a mesh-sided carrier and an expected due date of 7 days. I was instructed on how to determine the gender and that I needed …

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“Physicians have no autonomy.” I read and hear versions of this every day, expressed with anger, resignation, or both. It’s also called agency, control, and power (as in feeling empowered).

I’m the first one to admit that physicians have way less autonomy than in the ten decades that preceded this one. Moving from private practice to employed models, heightened focus on productivity, compensation via RVUs, and mergers have shifted the power …

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