Skip to content
  • About
  • Contact
  • Contribute
  • What Physicians Say
  • My Book
  • Careers
  • Podcast
  • Speaking
KevinMD.com — Social media's leading physician voice
  • All
  • Physician
  • Burnout
  • Practice
  • Policy
  • Finance
  • Conditions
  • .edu
  • Patient
  • Meds
  • Tech
  • Social
  • All
  • Physician
  • Burnout
  • Practice
  • Policy
  • Finance
  • Conditions
  • .edu
  • Patient
  • Meds
  • Tech
  • Social
    • All
    • Physician
    • Burnout
    • Practice
    • Policy
    • Finance
    • Conditions
    • .edu
    • Patient
    • Meds
    • Tech
    • Social
    • About
    • Contact
    • Contribute
    • What Physicians Say
    • My Book
    • Careers
    • Podcast
    • Speaking
KevinMD.com — Social media's leading physician voice
  • All
  • Physician
  • Burnout
  • Practice
  • Policy
  • Finance
  • Conditions
  • .edu
  • Patient
  • Meds
  • Tech
  • Social
    • All
    • Physician
    • Burnout
    • Practice
    • Policy
    • Finance
    • Conditions
    • .edu
    • Patient
    • Meds
    • Tech
    • Social
    • About
    • Contact
    • Contribute
    • What Physicians Say
    • My Book
    • Careers
    • Podcast
    • Speaking
  • About Kevin Pho, MD, Founder of KevinMD
  • Aging and dementia: what physicians say, in their own words
  • Artificial intelligence: what physicians say, in their own words
  • Be heard on social media’s leading physician voice
  • Cancer: what physicians say, in their own words
  • Children’s health: what pediatricians say, in their own words
  • Contact Kevin
  • COVID-19: what physicians wrote as it happened
  • Custom enhanced author page pricing
  • Diabetes and obesity: what physicians say, in their own words
  • Direct primary care: what physicians say, in their own words
  • DMCA Policy
  • End of life: what physicians say, in their own words
  • Establishing, Managing, and Protecting Your Online Reputation: A Social Media Guide for Physicians and Medical Practices
  • GLP-1 drugs: what physicians say about Ozempic and its successors, in their own words
  • Heart disease: what physicians say, in their own words
  • Immigration and medicine: what physicians say about immigrant doctors and immigrant patients, in their own words
  • KevinMD influencer opportunities
  • Medical errors: what physicians say, in their own words
  • Medical ethics: what physicians say, in their own words
  • Medical malpractice: what physicians say, in their own words
  • Medical school: what students and physicians say, in their own words
  • Mental health: what psychiatrists and physicians say, in their own words
  • Nursing: what nurses and physicians say, in their own words
  • Opinion and commentary by KevinMD
  • Opioids: what physicians and pain patients say, in their own words
  • Physician burnout speakers to keynote your conference
  • Physician burnout: what physicians say, in their own words
  • Physician Coaching by KevinMD
  • Physician keynote speaker: Kevin Pho, MD
  • Physician personal finance: what physicians say about their own money, in their own words
  • Physician Speaking by KevinMD: a boutique speakers bureau
  • Physician suicide: what physicians say, in their own words
  • Physicians and administrators: what physicians say about who runs medicine, in their own words
  • Primary care physician in Nashua, NH | Kevin Pho, MD
  • Primary care: what physicians say, in their own words
  • Prior authorization: what physicians say, in their own words
  • Privacy Policy
  • Private equity and corporate medicine: what physicians say, in their own words
  • Race and medicine: what physicians say, in their own words
  • Recommended services by KevinMD
  • Residency: what residents and attendings say, in their own words
  • Scope of practice: what physicians, nurse practitioners, and PAs say, in their own words
  • Subscribe to the KevinMD enhanced author page
  • Subscribe to the newsletter
  • Surgeons and surgery: what surgeons say, in their own words
  • Take-home messages: what physicians say when asked to leave one
  • Terms of Use Agreement
  • Thank you for subscribing to KevinMD
  • Thank you for upgrading to the KevinMD enhanced author page
  • The electronic health record: what physicians say, in their own words
  • Vaccines: what physicians say, in their own words
  • Violence against health care workers: what physicians and nurses say, in their own words
  • What physicians say: the KevinMD records
  • Women in medicine: what women physicians say, in their own words
  • Women’s health: what physicians say, in their own words

Let’s order a round of respect: for both patients and physicians

R. Lynn Barnett
Patient
June 6, 2018
Share
Tweet
Share

To complement Aaron Lacy’s post on treating colleagues with respect, I’d like to expand that concept to include treating patients with respect too. That means if a patient says she’s freezing, and adding insult to injury, has been sick as well,  adjust the thermostat a little, please, even if you as the doctor isn’t cold. When a stray cat came to our door in the dead of winter, my husband made a warm little spot for him in the garage. If it’s good enough for a cat, it should be good enough for person.

Mr. Lacy brought up many good points, one of which is to not embarrass a colleague, especially in front of others. That courtesy should be extended to a patient as well. If I say that I eat 1200 calories a day, but my 20 extra pounds of pudge won’t budge, don’t look at me as if I just said I was from Mars. I’m not, nor did I eat a Mars® candy bar, but I know how to count, and I eat about 1,200 calories a day. I was willing to wear a video camera to prove my actions, but when he told me that he had friends who went to Emory, my alma mater, I didn’t ask him to prove it. I took him at his word. If it was good enough for me to believe him, it should have been good enough for him to believe me.

Too many cooks spoil the medical office.  There have been times when I am instructed to leave a message with one person, who is going to relay that information to another person. However, that second person never gets the message, causing a lot of miscommunication and misunderstandings all the way around. After several phone messages, all was fine, but talk about the game, “telephone,” (where messages get misunderstood).

Doctors’ offices state that if you don’t pay within a certain period of time, you’ll be charged interest. What about when I’ve had to wait over 60 days for a refund? Do I get to charge interest? I’d be interested to know.

As Mr. Lacy pointed out, if you make a mistake, own up to it. Fingers will eventually point to you anyway. He also implored colleagues not to be mean. That should be part of everyone’s core. I mean it. We shouldn’t have to contend with rude attitudes.

How else can a doctor show respect to a patient? Maybe by knocking on the door. I mean, we’re not going to turn you away, but that 2-second knock humanizes us a little, so, knock knock Doc.

Of course, respect works both ways. I call my doctors Drs. So-and-so, but I don’t mind if they call me by my first name, but some people do.  I know medicine can be a calling, and you should be aware that calling a patient by a preferred name goes hand in hand with your profession. For me, just don’t say, “Hey Dude, “(although Dudette Barnett sounds OK).  Some new patient forms ask what name you’d like to be called, but that wasn’t always the case. Doctors would call my 85-year-old mom by her first name. She rolled with it, but I’d suggest starting with Mr. or Mrs., to avoid any misses.

Patients usually follow doctors’ orders, so let’s order a round of respect, all the way around.

R. Lynn Barnett is the author of What Patients Want: Anecdotes and Advice and My Mother has Alzheimer’s and My Dog Has Tapeworms:  A Caregiver’s Tale. She can be reached on Twtter @rlynnbarnett1.

Image credit: Shutterstock.com

Prev

The mental health implications of infertility

June 6, 2018 Kevin 0
…
Next

I saw first hand the ravages of cancer and bankruptcy

June 7, 2018 Kevin 1
…

Tagged as: Patients, Primary Care

< Previous Post
The mental health implications of infertility
Next Post >
I saw first hand the ravages of cancer and bankruptcy

 

ADVERTISEMENT

More by R. Lynn Barnett

  • Rosalynn Carter’s impact on caregivers

    R. Lynn Barnett
  • Why patients write: stress relief, self-care, and sharing experiences

    R. Lynn Barnett
  • A patient imagines a conversation with Alexa

    R. Lynn Barnett

Related Posts

  • Are patients using social media to attack physicians?

    David R. Stukus, MD
  • The complex expectations of patients toward their physicians

    Michael L. Millenson
  • Physicians and patients must work together to improve health care

    Michele Luckenbaugh
  • Violence in the emergency department puts patients and physicians at risk

    Vidor E. Friedman, MD
  • Physicians are trapped between patient satisfaction and unnecessary prescribing

    Richard Young, MD
  • Here are some things that patients wish doctors knew

    R. Lynn Barnett

More in Patient

  • Patient communication ends when the patient understands

    Diane Bruno
  • Book publishing scams took $7,500 from me by wire transfer

    Richard A. Lawhern, PhD
  • Cosmetic dentistry abroad is not about the lowest price

    Anna Estrin
  • There’s no one to drive your patient home

    Denise Reich
  • Dying is a selfish business

    Nancie Wiseman Attwater
  • A story of a good death

    Carol Ewig
  • Most Popular

  • Past Week

    • Retirement isn’t the end of medicine, it’s a second act [PODCAST]

      The Podcast by KevinMD | Podcast
    • The conflict of interest that discloses as nothing

      Martha Rosenberg | Medications
    • Surgical judgment: the skill no one sees from the gallery

      Mustafa Kemal Çalık, MD | Physician
    • Why haven’t ambient AI scribes boosted productivity?

      Karan Kanwar | Health Technology
    • 3 reforms to counter wellness influencers in practice

      Farid Sabet-Sharghi, MD | Physician
    • Physician well-being is not an individual problem

      Heather Buckley | Conditions and Diseases
  • Past 6 Months

    • Why CDC opioid guidelines get the overdose data wrong

      Richard A. Lawhern, PhD | Conditions and Diseases
    • Retirement isn’t the end of medicine, it’s a second act [PODCAST]

      The Podcast by KevinMD | Podcast
    • Sensory processing in autism and the brain’s volume control

      Josette Pelatan, PhD | Conditions and Diseases
    • What maternity care deserts cost a town

      Manisha Kaliaperumal | Health Policy
    • Why medicine needs a national physician license now

      Vaishali Popat, MD, MPH | Physician
    • A cold cost $945. The cost of primary care is broken.

      Susan Newman, MD | Physician
  • Recent Posts

    • 3 reforms to counter wellness influencers in practice

      Farid Sabet-Sharghi, MD | Physician
    • Shift work and circadian rhythms shape the 24/7 workplace

      Deepak Gupta, MD | Conditions and Diseases
    • Paid for twice

      Physicians paid for G2211 twice. Most never bill it.

      Michael Duben, MD | Physician Finance
    • The next child

      Medicaid managed care and the case for mutual stewardship

      Steven Merahn, MD | Health Policy
    • Choosing a limb lengthening surgeon requires accountability

      Hrayr Basmajian, MD | Physician
    • Cited but never checked

      Why AI crisis advice may fail families facing psychosis

      Nicole Drapeau Gillen | Health Technology

Subscribe to KevinMD and never miss a story!

Get free updates delivered free to your inbox.


Find jobs at
Careers by KevinMD.com

Search thousands of physician, PA, NP, and CRNA jobs now.

Learn more

View 4 Comments >

Founded in 2004 by Kevin Pho, MD, KevinMD.com is the web’s leading platform where physicians, advanced practitioners, nurses, medical students, and patients share their insight and tell their stories.

Social

  • Like on Facebook
  • Follow on Twitter
  • Connect on Linkedin
  • Subscribe on Youtube
  • Instagram

ADVERTISEMENT

  • Most Popular

  • Past Week

    • Retirement isn’t the end of medicine, it’s a second act [PODCAST]

      The Podcast by KevinMD | Podcast
    • The conflict of interest that discloses as nothing

      Martha Rosenberg | Medications
    • Surgical judgment: the skill no one sees from the gallery

      Mustafa Kemal Çalık, MD | Physician
    • Why haven’t ambient AI scribes boosted productivity?

      Karan Kanwar | Health Technology
    • 3 reforms to counter wellness influencers in practice

      Farid Sabet-Sharghi, MD | Physician
    • Physician well-being is not an individual problem

      Heather Buckley | Conditions and Diseases
  • Past 6 Months

    • Why CDC opioid guidelines get the overdose data wrong

      Richard A. Lawhern, PhD | Conditions and Diseases
    • Retirement isn’t the end of medicine, it’s a second act [PODCAST]

      The Podcast by KevinMD | Podcast
    • Sensory processing in autism and the brain’s volume control

      Josette Pelatan, PhD | Conditions and Diseases
    • What maternity care deserts cost a town

      Manisha Kaliaperumal | Health Policy
    • Why medicine needs a national physician license now

      Vaishali Popat, MD, MPH | Physician
    • A cold cost $945. The cost of primary care is broken.

      Susan Newman, MD | Physician
  • Recent Posts

    • 3 reforms to counter wellness influencers in practice

      Farid Sabet-Sharghi, MD | Physician
    • Shift work and circadian rhythms shape the 24/7 workplace

      Deepak Gupta, MD | Conditions and Diseases
    • Paid for twice

      Physicians paid for G2211 twice. Most never bill it.

      Michael Duben, MD | Physician Finance
    • The next child

      Medicaid managed care and the case for mutual stewardship

      Steven Merahn, MD | Health Policy
    • Choosing a limb lengthening surgeon requires accountability

      Hrayr Basmajian, MD | Physician
    • Cited but never checked

      Why AI crisis advice may fail families facing psychosis

      Nicole Drapeau Gillen | Health Technology

Copyright © 2026 KevinMD.com | Powered by Astra WordPress Theme

  • Terms of Use Agreement
  • Privacy Policy
  • DMCA Policy
All Content © KevinMD, LLC
Site by Outthink Group

Let’s order a round of respect: for both patients and physicians
4 comments

Comments are moderated before they are published. Please read the comment policy.

Loading Comments...