Skip to content
  • About
  • Contact
  • Contribute
  • Book
  • Careers
  • Podcast
  • Recommended
  • Speaking
  • All
  • Physician
  • Practice
  • Policy
  • Finance
  • Conditions
  • .edu
  • Patient
  • Meds
  • Tech
  • Social
  • Video
    • All
    • Physician
    • Practice
    • Policy
    • Finance
    • Conditions
    • .edu
    • Patient
    • Meds
    • Tech
    • Social
    • Video
    • About
    • Contact
    • Contribute
    • Book
    • Careers
    • Podcast
    • Recommended
    • Speaking

A nurse remembers her true hero

Debbie Moore-Black, RN
Conditions
August 16, 2020
Share
Tweet
Share

I had to earn my “stripes” in ICU. After I graduated from nursing school, the “big” hospitals wouldn’t take me into the ICU, as I had no experience as an ICU nurse. Back in the early 1980s, there was no such thing as an internship program.

I desperately wanted to become an ICU nurse. So a small-town county hospital took me in. It was a six-bed “ICU,” and I slowly learned the basics of ICU nursing. The county hospital sent me on a 60-hour hemodynamics class, which opened up my eyes even more! After one year at this hospital, I was ready to spread my wings.

I applied to the big hospital, big city ICU. And they took me in. The orientation was four weeks. 16 beds. Ventilators, EKG monitors, nurses in light blue scrubs, code blue’s, computers. I was in awe.

Eventually, I worked and assisted physicians and respiratory therapists in intubating patients, inserting central lines, Swan-Ganz monitoring, learning about pulmonary capillary wedge pressure (PCWP) and fluid overload, and deadly arrhythmias.

But there was one ICU nurse who I instinctively knew I must gravitate towards.

Carolyn. She had a “glow” about her. She had wisdom and knowledge. She was calm but a strong force. She was kind but direct. She explained arrhythmias and irregular EKGs to me. But she taught me with kindness and patience. She was never condescending. Never a bully. Never a “know it all.”

She challenged upper management and physicians for the sake of our patients and for the sake of us fellow nurses.

I knew that “when I grew up,” I wanted to be just like her if possible. I adored Carolyn. I loved her dry wit, her intelligence, her spunk. She gladly took us young ones under her wing.

When she clocked out, she had a whole other life. A loving wife and mother to several children, she was the neighborhood mom too.
I’ll never understand how she had so much energy. Her plate was full.

She did finally retire and consumed her time with her family and her grandbabies she adored.

Sadly, we received the news the other day. Her husband tried to wake her up. She was unresponsive. Medics rushed her into the emergency department. She coded several times. She never made it to the ICU. This time as a patient.

There are frequent tears in my eyes. Even writing this. She was the epitome of an ICU nurse. Her intelligence surpassed many. But she was the quiet storm in a chaotic ICU.

Though Carolyn had a heart of gold, her physical heart had taken its toll.

ADVERTISEMENT

You will always be my hero. My shining star.

Sing with the angels Carolyn, because you were certainly an angel here on earth.

Debbie Moore-Black is a nurse who blogs at Do Not Resuscitate.

Image credit: Shutterstock.com

Prev

A letter to 2020 interns

August 16, 2020 Kevin 0
…
Next

The next time you're on call, please rethink what white and black clouds mean

August 16, 2020 Kevin 5
…

Tagged as: Critical Care, Nursing

Post navigation

< Previous Post
A letter to 2020 interns
Next Post >
The next time you're on call, please rethink what white and black clouds mean

ADVERTISEMENT

More by Debbie Moore-Black, RN

  • What money can’t fix: the scars left by a friend

    Debbie Moore-Black, RN
  • A retired ICU nurse’s brunch conversation sparks a life-changing moment

    Debbie Moore-Black, RN
  • Wisdom for new nurses: lessons from a 30-year ICU veteran

    Debbie Moore-Black, RN

Related Posts

  • Registered nurse for president!

    John Green, DHA, RN
  • “You’re making a huge mistake because you’re threatening a nurse.”

    Admin
  • A nurse willing to forgive others. And to forgive herself.

    Debbie Moore-Black, RN
  • How nurse practitioners can expand abortion access

    Vanessa Shields-Haas, RN
  • Why a nurse should not go to jail

    Barbara L. Olson, RN
  • Nurse practitioners will save primary care

    Leah Hellerstein, LCSW

More in Conditions

  • Why medicine must stop worshipping burnout and start valuing humanity

    Sarah White, APRN
  • Why perinatal mental health is the top cause of maternal death in the U.S.

    Sheila Noon
  • A world without vaccines: What history teaches us about public health

    Drew Remignanti, MD, MPH
  • Unraveling the mystery behind one of the most dangerous pregnancy complications: preeclampsia

    Thomas McElrath, MD, PhD and Kara Rood, MD
  • How community paramedicine impacts Indigenous elders

    Noah Weinberg
  • Pain is more than physical: the story your body is trying to tell

    Katie Hatt, DO
  • Most Popular

  • Past Week

    • Why are medical students turning away from primary care? [PODCAST]

      The Podcast by KevinMD | Podcast
    • Here’s what providers really need in a modern EHR

      Laura Kohlhagen, MD, MBA | Tech
    • Why “do no harm” might be harming modern medicine

      Sabooh S. Mubbashar, MD | Physician
    • How community paramedicine impacts Indigenous elders

      Noah Weinberg | Conditions
    • Addressing U.S. vaccine inequities in vulnerable communities [PODCAST]

      The Podcast by KevinMD | Podcast
    • How to speak the language of leadership to improve doctor wellness [PODCAST]

      The Podcast by KevinMD | Podcast
  • Past 6 Months

    • Why tracking cognitive load could save doctors and patients

      Hiba Fatima Hamid | Education
    • Why are medical students turning away from primary care? [PODCAST]

      The Podcast by KevinMD | Podcast
    • Why “do no harm” might be harming modern medicine

      Sabooh S. Mubbashar, MD | Physician
    • Here’s what providers really need in a modern EHR

      Laura Kohlhagen, MD, MBA | Tech
    • What the world must learn from the life and death of Hind Rajab

      Saba Qaiser, RN | Conditions
    • How medical culture hides burnout in plain sight

      Marco Benítez | Conditions
  • Recent Posts

    • Addressing U.S. vaccine inequities in vulnerable communities [PODCAST]

      The Podcast by KevinMD | Podcast
    • Why Canada is losing its skilled immigrant doctors

      Olumuyiwa Bamgbade, MD | Physician
    • Why doctors are reclaiming control from burnout culture

      Maureen Gibbons, MD | Physician
    • Would The Pitts’ Dr. Robby Robinavitch welcome a new colleague? Yes. Especially if their initials were AI.

      Gabe Jones, MBA | Tech
    • Why medicine must stop worshipping burnout and start valuing humanity

      Sarah White, APRN | Conditions
    • Why screening for diseases you might have can backfire

      Andy Lazris, MD and Alan Roth, DO | Physician

Subscribe to KevinMD and never miss a story!

Get free updates delivered free to your inbox.


Find jobs at
Careers by KevinMD.com

Search thousands of physician, PA, NP, and CRNA jobs now.

Learn more

View 1 Comments >

Founded in 2004 by Kevin Pho, MD, KevinMD.com is the web’s leading platform where physicians, advanced practitioners, nurses, medical students, and patients share their insight and tell their stories.

Social

  • Like on Facebook
  • Follow on Twitter
  • Connect on Linkedin
  • Subscribe on Youtube
  • Instagram

ADVERTISEMENT

  • Most Popular

  • Past Week

    • Why are medical students turning away from primary care? [PODCAST]

      The Podcast by KevinMD | Podcast
    • Here’s what providers really need in a modern EHR

      Laura Kohlhagen, MD, MBA | Tech
    • Why “do no harm” might be harming modern medicine

      Sabooh S. Mubbashar, MD | Physician
    • How community paramedicine impacts Indigenous elders

      Noah Weinberg | Conditions
    • Addressing U.S. vaccine inequities in vulnerable communities [PODCAST]

      The Podcast by KevinMD | Podcast
    • How to speak the language of leadership to improve doctor wellness [PODCAST]

      The Podcast by KevinMD | Podcast
  • Past 6 Months

    • Why tracking cognitive load could save doctors and patients

      Hiba Fatima Hamid | Education
    • Why are medical students turning away from primary care? [PODCAST]

      The Podcast by KevinMD | Podcast
    • Why “do no harm” might be harming modern medicine

      Sabooh S. Mubbashar, MD | Physician
    • Here’s what providers really need in a modern EHR

      Laura Kohlhagen, MD, MBA | Tech
    • What the world must learn from the life and death of Hind Rajab

      Saba Qaiser, RN | Conditions
    • How medical culture hides burnout in plain sight

      Marco Benítez | Conditions
  • Recent Posts

    • Addressing U.S. vaccine inequities in vulnerable communities [PODCAST]

      The Podcast by KevinMD | Podcast
    • Why Canada is losing its skilled immigrant doctors

      Olumuyiwa Bamgbade, MD | Physician
    • Why doctors are reclaiming control from burnout culture

      Maureen Gibbons, MD | Physician
    • Would The Pitts’ Dr. Robby Robinavitch welcome a new colleague? Yes. Especially if their initials were AI.

      Gabe Jones, MBA | Tech
    • Why medicine must stop worshipping burnout and start valuing humanity

      Sarah White, APRN | Conditions
    • Why screening for diseases you might have can backfire

      Andy Lazris, MD and Alan Roth, DO | Physician

MedPage Today Professional

An Everyday Health Property Medpage Today
  • Terms of Use | Disclaimer
  • Privacy Policy
  • DMCA Policy
All Content © KevinMD, LLC
Site by Outthink Group

A nurse remembers her true hero
1 comments

Comments are moderated before they are published. Please read the comment policy.

Loading Comments...