Skip to content
  • About
  • Contact
  • Contribute
  • Book
  • Careers
  • Podcast
  • Recommended
  • Speaking
  • All
  • Physician
  • Practice
  • Policy
  • Finance
  • Conditions
  • .edu
  • Patient
  • Meds
  • Tech
  • Social
  • Video
    • All
    • Physician
    • Practice
    • Policy
    • Finance
    • Conditions
    • .edu
    • Patient
    • Meds
    • Tech
    • Social
    • Video
    • About
    • Contact
    • Contribute
    • Book
    • Careers
    • Podcast
    • Recommended
    • Speaking

How a death prepared me for a pandemic

Jill Fleming
Conditions
February 27, 2021
Share
Tweet
Share

Since last March, every day has been filled with news of COVID-19 statistics: surges, declines, the myriad of symptoms, and the staggering number of deaths. As a 23-year-old pre-med post-bacc student, I was suddenly moving home — with my apartment’s meager supply of toilet paper and Clorox wipes — to spend the unforeseeable future with my parents.

Like many, the first few weeks were filled with uncertainty, worry, and a naïve optimism, or perhaps ignorance, that this unusual virus would be figured out soon, and within weeks we would get back to “business as usual.” The weeks and months wore on.

The fear of COVID-19 grew as new and varying symptoms were reported. But, people’s patience also wore thin.  Not only were we all dealing with the stress surrounding fears about the virus, but we were also dealing with the emotional, mental, and physical strain that isolation had put on us. Our lives were abruptly interrupted in so many ways, yet we were asked to carry on and shoulder these burdens in seclusion.

The emotions I felt and am still feeling during this pandemic echo the experience of chaos and absurdity I was confronted with when my dad died suddenly. We as humans struggle to grasp both concepts, so it manifests in grief, anger, numbness, all while still being forced to carry on.

The familiarity of these emotions was almost comforting, knowing I had experienced a life-altering, perception-shattering loss. It was a loss of a loved one and ultimately a loss of the person I was and the life I had before.  Five years later from the sudden loss of my dad, I found myself facing another uncertainty, this time in the form of the COVID-19 pandemic. I almost felt emotionally prepared, thinking if I survived my dad’s death and came out on the other side, I could (at least emotionally) cope with this pandemic and the volatility it was to bring.

Throughout this year, I have spoken with friends and family about this traumatic time. We are isolated, we are afraid, we are worried for ourselves and loved ones, and most of all, we are coping the best we can. Coping also means grieving: grieving the lost time, lost opportunities, lost youth, lost year(s), lost social interaction, and let’s not forget the lost lives.

Whether you or a loved one has tested positive for COVID-19 or not, we have all been personally affected by the pandemic in varied and unique ways. Some of us powered on and clung to the mundane in our lives. Some appreciated being able to work from home but also dealt with the double-edged sword of increased isolation. Some of us ventured out every day to work in-person, braving the potential of contracting an uncertain and deadly virus- and to frontline workers, we thank you.

And just as trauma and death can take time and distance for the real reckoning and grieving to begin, we will all have a moment where we take a deep breath, feel a sense of relief that the worst is over, and then the realization and grief sets in. But with grief comes healing and perspective, and that is what I am hopeful for.

Jill Fleming is a premedical student.

Image credit: Shutterstock.com

Prev

Why health care professionals must call for splitting the autism spectrum

February 27, 2021 Kevin 0
…
Next

Why creative endeavors are important for the future surgeon

February 27, 2021 Kevin 0
…

Tagged as: COVID, Infectious Disease

Post navigation

< Previous Post
Why health care professionals must call for splitting the autism spectrum
Next Post >
Why creative endeavors are important for the future surgeon

ADVERTISEMENT

Related Posts

  • How the COVID-19 pandemic highlights the need for social media training in medical education 

    Oscar Chen, Sera Choi, and Clara Seong
  • Why this physician marched during a pandemic

    Raj Sundar, MD
  • The first day of medical training during a pandemic

    Elizabeth D. Patton
  • I challenge you to discuss death

    Emily S. Hagen, MD
  • My grandfather’s death: What I’ve learned about life

    Munera Ahmed
  • Death and Dvořák

    Daniel Song, MD

More in Conditions

  • Mpox isn’t over: A silent epidemic is growing

    Melvin Sanicas, MD
  • How your family system secretly shapes your health

    Su Yeong Kim, PhD
  • The human case for preserving the nipple after mastectomy

    Thomas Amburn, MD
  • Inside the high-stakes world of neurosurgery

    Isaac Yang, MD
  • Why I left the clinic to lead health care from the inside

    Vandana Maurya, MHA
  • One injection dropped LDL by 69 percent. Should we celebrate?

    Larry Kaskel, MD
  • Most Popular

  • Past Week

    • Why your clinic waiting room may affect patient outcomes

      Ziya Altug, PT, DPT and Shirish Sachdeva, PT, DPT | Conditions
    • Nuclear verdicts and rising costs: How inflation is reshaping medical malpractice claims

      Robert E. White, Jr. & The Doctors Company | Policy
    • How new loan caps could destroy diversity in medical education

      Caleb Andrus-Gazyeva | Policy
    • Why transplant equity requires more than access

      Zamra Amjid, DHSc, MHA | Policy
    • The ethical crossroads of medicine and legislation

      M. Bennet Broner, PhD | Conditions
    • How robotics are transforming the next generation of vascular care [PODCAST]

      The Podcast by KevinMD | Podcast
  • Past 6 Months

    • Health equity in Inland Southern California requires urgent action

      Vishruth Nagam | Policy
    • Why transgender health care needs urgent reform and inclusive practices

      Angela Rodriguez, MD | Conditions
    • How restrictive opioid policies worsen the crisis

      Kayvan Haddadan, MD | Physician
    • New student loan caps could shut low-income students out of medicine

      Tom Phan, MD | Physician
    • Why pain doctors face unfair scrutiny and harsh penalties in California

      Kayvan Haddadan, MD | Physician
    • mRNA post vaccination syndrome: Is it real?

      Harry Oken, MD | Conditions
  • Recent Posts

    • How robotics are transforming the next generation of vascular care [PODCAST]

      The Podcast by KevinMD | Podcast
    • The high cost of gender inequity in medicine

      Kolleen Dougherty, MD | Physician
    • Mpox isn’t over: A silent epidemic is growing

      Melvin Sanicas, MD | Conditions
    • How your family system secretly shapes your health

      Su Yeong Kim, PhD | Conditions
    • Women physicians: How can they survive and thrive in academic medicine?

      Elina Maymind, MD | Physician
    • The human case for preserving the nipple after mastectomy

      Thomas Amburn, MD | Conditions

Subscribe to KevinMD and never miss a story!

Get free updates delivered free to your inbox.


Find jobs at
Careers by KevinMD.com

Search thousands of physician, PA, NP, and CRNA jobs now.

Learn more

Leave a Comment

Founded in 2004 by Kevin Pho, MD, KevinMD.com is the web’s leading platform where physicians, advanced practitioners, nurses, medical students, and patients share their insight and tell their stories.

Social

  • Like on Facebook
  • Follow on Twitter
  • Connect on Linkedin
  • Subscribe on Youtube
  • Instagram

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

  • Most Popular

  • Past Week

    • Why your clinic waiting room may affect patient outcomes

      Ziya Altug, PT, DPT and Shirish Sachdeva, PT, DPT | Conditions
    • Nuclear verdicts and rising costs: How inflation is reshaping medical malpractice claims

      Robert E. White, Jr. & The Doctors Company | Policy
    • How new loan caps could destroy diversity in medical education

      Caleb Andrus-Gazyeva | Policy
    • Why transplant equity requires more than access

      Zamra Amjid, DHSc, MHA | Policy
    • The ethical crossroads of medicine and legislation

      M. Bennet Broner, PhD | Conditions
    • How robotics are transforming the next generation of vascular care [PODCAST]

      The Podcast by KevinMD | Podcast
  • Past 6 Months

    • Health equity in Inland Southern California requires urgent action

      Vishruth Nagam | Policy
    • Why transgender health care needs urgent reform and inclusive practices

      Angela Rodriguez, MD | Conditions
    • How restrictive opioid policies worsen the crisis

      Kayvan Haddadan, MD | Physician
    • New student loan caps could shut low-income students out of medicine

      Tom Phan, MD | Physician
    • Why pain doctors face unfair scrutiny and harsh penalties in California

      Kayvan Haddadan, MD | Physician
    • mRNA post vaccination syndrome: Is it real?

      Harry Oken, MD | Conditions
  • Recent Posts

    • How robotics are transforming the next generation of vascular care [PODCAST]

      The Podcast by KevinMD | Podcast
    • The high cost of gender inequity in medicine

      Kolleen Dougherty, MD | Physician
    • Mpox isn’t over: A silent epidemic is growing

      Melvin Sanicas, MD | Conditions
    • How your family system secretly shapes your health

      Su Yeong Kim, PhD | Conditions
    • Women physicians: How can they survive and thrive in academic medicine?

      Elina Maymind, MD | Physician
    • The human case for preserving the nipple after mastectomy

      Thomas Amburn, MD | Conditions

MedPage Today Professional

An Everyday Health Property Medpage Today
  • Terms of Use | Disclaimer
  • Privacy Policy
  • DMCA Policy
All Content © KevinMD, LLC
Site by Outthink Group

Leave a Comment

Comments are moderated before they are published. Please read the comment policy.

Loading Comments...