You know the real flex in life is to be able to stretch out like a cat on a random Tuesday and not worry about bills or appointments or being anywhere.

I think there’s something truly to be said about time freedom (and not only time freedom, but freedom of self) where we can let go of the guilt and shame and all these things that hustle culture has ingrained in us and actually truly be able to let go energetically.

To have energetic sovereignty means to live each moment independent of the moments that came before it and independent of the moment that came after it. So when you actually have a day off, it means lounging on the couch, not folding the laundry or taking the trash out, and just being there in stillness.

It’s so funny how humans have such a hard time with moments of suspension. You know, we are constantly feeling guilty about the work we have to do or the things that need to get done, but if each woman is liberated and is free, we let it be.

So what if instead of worrying about all the things that you know will eventually get done anyways, maybe we allow ourselves the gift of stillness, of actual unencompassed space and time to nap on a Tuesday or to go to bed at 3 a.m.

Even when you have to work the next morning, is it responsible? Definitely not. But is it soul-fulfilling sometimes? Maybe.

The prison of rules

We just don’t need to have so many rules for ourselves.

I mean, aren’t there enough rules governing earth that tell us what time we can go pee and when we can go take a shit and what time we can check our email?

But I think the biggest energetic trouble we get into is when we start enforcing the world’s rules on ourselves. Because I think what is the scariest thing for the world and for capitalism is people that are actually free.

When people actually realize that the stuff that they’re selling on Amazon is just trying to fill a void within that will never be filled with more stuff, or when people realize that when they are spending time in a job for more money, they’re losing the most precious commodity which we’re never going to get back: time.

And also to be able to honor ourselves and all the seasons. Even in seasons when you have young kids, to be like: You know what, I need time for myself, even when I have young kids.

And that may mean that I may miss a moment with them. But how many moments are we missing with ourselves?

Unmasking the self

So much of it is about integrity and emotional honesty with ourselves. I think that’s where we all run into trouble: that if we can’t even face ourselves in the mirror when we wake up in the morning, how can we face the world?

Because in reality, the world is an illusion. Nobody is really living the type of Instagram lives that they talk about. And the people that are the most verbal about how amazing things are going are oftentimes holding the deepest, darkest insecurities.

So maybe just for a while, just with ourselves, we take the masks down and unmask ourselves and just admit that we’re tired and we want to be selfish, and we do want to take an eight-hour nap without a toddler or a husband.

And that’s completely okay.

I think there is a special type of freedom when we gain that type of energetic sovereignty, which doesn’t mean that you want to go into the forest naked and live in a jungle (which I honestly have thought about oftentimes) but then the reality of the bugs and all that kicks in.

But maybe it’s about creating a forest and a jungle in Bali in our own hearts that has always been there.

Maybe the prisons that we surround ourselves with (the ones we build with our own hands, with our own intentions and dreams) and maybe the expectations that we have of ourselves is what’s really suffocating us the most.

Reclaiming the moment

So all in all, I think that energetic sovereignty is about taking moments back of our lives. Because we’ve been told that we need more things to be beautiful, we need to be thinner, and we need to only eat organic and all these things, but it’s like, so many rules.

You know, maybe we build little pockets in our day that are just ours. Where we can create a mess and color outside the lines and be late.

And maybe that’s okay.

Maybe that’s what being human is all about: being. Instead of just being functional adults that are all tied into duty, maybe having some fun.

You know, maybe watching something completely useless. Or maybe creating something in the kitchen that may not look pretty, but tastes great. Or planting random plants that you don’t remember what you planted, but then suddenly you have a garden full of plants that are beautiful.

Or maybe it’s just staring at the clouds or stargazing on a random Monday.

I think it’s about freedom of time and space and realizing that if we are really one in 13 billion, do you think if the only purpose of our lives was to go to work, come back, go to bed, go to work, come back, go to bed?

I think the purpose of being human is to be. To feel. To touch. To see all the beauty. To create.

That’s where our lives are.

We’re always set up to chase all these things that don’t actually matter. When it’s the simplest moments (a warm cup on our fingertips, the first rainfall, the way an earthworm just squiggles in the grass) those are the moments that are really human.

So instead of spreadsheets and promotions and bank balances and what our Fidelity account holds, maybe a better assessment of our lives is:

• How many times did we giggle?
• How many times did we actually let our tears (that we’d been holding back from all our disappointments) pour through?
• How many times did we sit in the dark with ourselves, with emotions we never wanted to face?
• How many times have we truly been honest with ourselves, truly honest, without looking away?

And that’s what a meaningful life is, at least to me.

Preyasha Tuladhar is a family physician