In memory of Brian Wilson (1942–2025).
In a world increasingly marked by fracture and fear, it is hard not to return to the quiet, aching clarity of Brian Wilson’s song Love and Mercy. Originally released in 1988, the song was not a protest anthem or a sweeping political critique. Instead, it was a simple, open-hearted wish: “Love and mercy, that’s what you need tonight. So, love and mercy to you and …
There’s so much we don’t say out loud.
Not because it’s not true.
Not because it doesn’t matter.
But because somewhere along the way, we were taught that strength looks like silence—and that if we’re struggling, it must mean we’re doing something wrong. Or maybe we just forgot, in the brain fog of postpartum hormones and the blur of sleepless nights.
I’m a family physician. I’m also a mother to an amazingly bright and …
“Those who forget the past are condemned to repeat it.”
Didn’t take long, did it?
The quote in the title is from George Santayana. The movie is It’s a Wonderful Life with Jimmy Stewart as George Bailey along with Clarence Odbody, who played Clarence the angel. The scenes are from the moments when Clarence shows George what the world would have been without him and his value to his family, his friends, …
The perpetuation of the increasing abuse of physicians across our nation has reached a level now that is essentially unrepairable. The Medical-Industrial-Economic Complex (Deep State of Medicine) has been the aggressive predator of the medical profession for decades. It is not by chance that the planning for the takeover of health care and the medical profession came into being decades ago.
Older physicians have seen and experienced all the tactics that …
Administrative violence in medicine is often understood as harm to patients due to systemic issues; however, administrative violence in medicine is also a process used to inflict harm on physicians, destabilizing the medical field on both systemic and individual levels. While much attention is given to how institutions and governments perpetuate administrative violence, it can also be enacted by individuals toward individual physicians with great harm, particularly by other physicians …
All medical malpractice lawsuits stem from complications caused by medical interventions. Some complications are random errors of nature, which are unpreventable. Others are systemic medical errors, caused by medical interventions gone astray. Clinically, a medical error and an error of nature are indistinguishable. Herein lies the problem in medical malpractice.
It is not that the inability to differentiate a systemic medical error from a random error of nature is unknown. On …
“Happiness is the absence of striving for happiness.”
– Chuang Tzu
A hunter once lost his way deep inside the jungle while chasing a deer. He used all his navigation skills, but he did not find any way out of the jungle or food for several days. He started feeling so hungry that he could eat an entire elephant in one go. Disappointed, he lost all hope. And that is exactly when …
“I will catch you on the flip side,” I said these words as I planted a kiss on Laura’s clammy forehead. I instinctively knew this would be the last time I spoke with her. I walked around the foot of her hospital bed to Sherry and told her not to get up as I bent over and gave her a big hug, the kind where I buried my face in …
Gaslighting manifests in many forms. The most common may be political fights involving the extreme positions on any controversial issue (e.g., gun control, abortion, immigration, you name it). One extreme faction claims they have the truth and blames the opposing extreme faction for the problems in our world. We see this every day in news reports. Those who have experienced gaslighting know that political fights involve gaslighting on steroids.
Another common …
Doctors are born to serve. We say yes to the late shifts, cover for colleagues, sign up for the committee, and go the extra mile for our patients.
Somewhere along the way, that instinct to serve often mutates into something sneakier: The belief that we must constantly prove our worth through more letters behind our name.
I’ve seen it repeatedly. Physicians burned out in their clinical roles start looking for a way …
In medicine, we were taught to value humility over pride. To downplay our successes. To “just do our job.” Even as we achieve remarkable things, we rarely pause to acknowledge them, let alone celebrate.
Pride feels risky. Many physicians worry that being proud means being egotistical, self-important, or inconsiderate of others who may be struggling. We were trained to attribute our successes to the team, to luck, or hard work—never to …
It was after dinner at The Goring, just the three of us—Ulla, David Chipp, and me. The kind of dinner where the wine lingers longer than the food, and the conversation slips into the quietly personal.
David, once Reuters’ correspondent in Peking during the Mao years and later editor-in-chief of the Press Association, handed me a gift: a copy of E. M. Forster’s What I believe. Inside, he had written a line …
Like many of us in health care, I recently became engrossed in The Pitt. If you’re still watching—or plan to—consider this your spoiler alert. HBO’s new medical drama immerses viewers in a grueling 14-hour shift in the ER of a trauma center. I initially tuned in for Noah Wyle, my teenage crush, but I stayed for the catharsis. Never have I related on such a visceral level to the portrayal …
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Have you been encouraged to play more by your medical providers recently?
Most likely, the answer is “no.”
However, as a family medicine physician myself, I have begun to see the importance of play for many aspects of our health.
When scholars define playfulness, curiosity, spontaneity, and the freedom to suspend reality are some of the ways it is described.
I might ask right here for you to consider how those elements are important …
In a few weeks, we will be celebrating our 249th Independence Day, which brings celebratory vibes but concerns about how the Constitution is being ignored. Who will stand to defend it? In today’s America—where civil liberties are too often dismissed as inconvenient and the Constitution is treated like a museum piece rather than a living covenant—we are called to remember the physician patriots who helped birth this nation. Not only with …
As a child, I was an introvert. Due to various circumstances, I didn’t have the opportunity to play any sports.
On many days, I see young children playing football or cricket in the large cricket park in front of my home. Various trainers from different sports clubs bring their teams of girls and boys to play football. They do stretches and warm-up runs, and I watch them from a distance.
I stop …
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In an age where medicine is increasingly shaped by administrators, algorithms, and corporate cost-cutting, physicians find themselves stripped of many of the economic tools that once defined their professional autonomy.
The days when physicians—especially in fields like internal medicine, pediatrics, and even general surgery—could rely on billing, collections, and the straightforward logic of fee-for-service income are largely over. Reimbursement has stagnated or declined in real terms, overhead costs rise yearly, and …
An excerpt from Real Medicine, Unreal Stories: Lessons and Insights from Clinical Practice.
The magnolias were blooming early this spring, their pale pink petals fluttering down onto the worn brick pathway outside the hospital courtyard. Dr. Eva Cardenas wrapped her thin white coat tighter as she waited on a bench, the same one she used to eat lunch on during the worst months of 2020, six feet apart from everyone …
An excerpt from Doctor Slave: Reflections on the Future of Medicine.
The distance from clinical practice provided a clarity that was impossible to achieve while embedded within the system. From outside, I could see patterns, pressures, and paradoxes that had been invisible when I was caught in the daily grind.
I recognized that many aspects of modern health care that are presented as inevitable or necessary are actually artificial constructs designed …
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I’ve had a few moments in my life where time seems to stand still.
I’m not talking about being in the flow of creativity or about a near-death experience. I’m referring to those times where a sudden realization makes you reconsider how you’ve viewed yourself or your life in fundamental ways.
After leaving clinical practice, I was dogged by guilt and shame for at least a decade. I viewed my choice as …
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