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Join us as we sit down with Olivia Ong, a pain and rehabilitation medicine physician from Australia, who shares her remarkable journey of recovery after a spinal cord injury in 2008. Once self-sufficient to a fault, Olivia found herself in a dark place, feeling alone and defeated. Her story takes a transformative turn when she discovers a center for spinal cord injury recovery in San Diego and, with the help of her trainer, Mica, takes her first steps toward a new life in 2011. Olivia discusses the profound impact of self-compassion, mindfulness, and acceptance on her recovery and how these principles have reshaped her approach to patient care.

Olivia Ong is a pain and rehabilitation medicine physician in Australia.

She discusses the KevinMD article, “The first time I walked again after a spinal cord injury.”

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Transcript

Kevin Pho: Hi, and welcome to the show. Subscribe at KevinMD.com/podcast, and get CME for this episode by clicking on the CME link in the show notes. Today we welcome back Olivia Ong. She’s a pain and rehabilitation medicine physician in Australia, where it is currently 2 in the morning, so thank you Olivia for joining me. Her most recent article is “The first time I walked again after a spinal cord injury.” Olivia, welcome back to the show.

Olivia Ong: Thanks for having me again, Kevin.

Kevin Pho: So Olivia’s been on, like she said, before. Go to KevinMD.com/podcast to hear her story and prior episodes. But today let’s talk about your most recent article, “The first time I walked again after a spinal cord injury.” So tell us about this article.

Olivia Ong: Yeah, I think I was really inspired to write this article for KevinMD because I’m currently writing my memoir, and I felt that it’s really important to just talk about what I’ve been through. It’s been something that I’ve kind of not shared with a lot of people. You know, as physicians, when bad things happen to us we just try to push it away. But I think this story is really not mine to keep, it’s to share with people.

So I had a spinal cord injury in 2008. That was when I was hit by a car, basically on my way to work. So quite a devastating injury, very serious. I ended up having an L1-L2 dislocation in my back, and the L2 burst vertebral fracture, and cauda equina syndrome. So that’s a lot of things there, but it actually just means that I became a paraplegic within a second, and I was paralyzed from the waist down. I couldn’t feel my legs, couldn’t move my legs. And the whole experience was, I guess I was in a lot of shock, surreal.

But I think after the whole acute injury happened, I had a lot of time to unpack things in the rehabilitation hospital. I had time to think about what truly mattered to me, what I really wanted to do in my life. And also I cannot forget, obviously, the emotions that came with it, the five stages of grief, that’s essentially what happened with the spinal injury.

But I guess I wanted to just share that it wasn’t doom and gloom, because I had the opportunity, probably a year after my injury, to relocate to Carlsbad, California. So I’m sure you know where Carlsbad is, that’s Legoland. Yeah, it was an amazing place to relocate. Southern California is amazing, close to San Diego, also close to LA. And I had the opportunity to spend three years there to relearn to walk again.

And amazing experiences. I think that was when I was indoctrinated into the American culture. I loved it very much. My dear friends who I’m still keeping contact with, they’ve all had spinal injuries, and they welcomed me with open arms. They invited me to parties, Thanksgiving, Halloween, which we don’t celebrate in Australia but you guys obviously celebrate it in a very different way, and obviously Christmas parties and everything. And I also attended lots of football games, the Chargers. I mean, Chargers was I guess attached to San Diego, so I got to watch a lot of matches. I think there was Broncos as well. So lots of good moments there.

And what really was interesting was, I thought that I’ll just go in there, have one mission, which was just to walk, and then just go home back to Australia. But I didn’t realize the friendships I made were so important, actually helped me heal from the injury itself, not just physically, emotionally, mentally, spiritually.

So I think I just wanted to kind of share that with your audience. And I guess the most important thing was, I just learned to be kinder to myself. And every little win I had every day, whether it was a big toe moving or I walked a little bit more, that made, you know, I just celebrated every single one. So I think that was my experience in a nutshell, but yeah, we can definitely chat about it.

Kevin Pho: Sure. So during that rehabilitation journey, which took of course several years, I think one of the first things that you mentioned is that you had so much to unpack. And before this tragic accident you were, I assume, a very busy physician training, and a very linear path, but all of a sudden that stopped so suddenly and gave you a lot of time to think. What was that like? What did you think about during that time you were rehabilitating?

Olivia Ong: Yeah, it’s quite interesting when you have a lot of time to yourself, you have time to reflect on the good things and, suddenly, bad things, more of the bad things in life actually.

Because at that point in time I was obviously grieving through the loss of my mobility, my independence. You know, I went from someone who was very high functioning physician, able bodied, running around, I was teaching aerobics classes at that time, very high level and dancing a lot, and I couldn’t do those activities anymore. I just felt like I was angry. I was really angry, like I was only 28 when this happened. You can imagine, as a 28 year old with life ahead of me.

And yeah, I was really angry at the driver who hit me. He was a 92-year-old fellow with dementia. So just be careful about who you let on the road, especially people with dementia.

And I was just bargaining with God, like, please give me some kind of chance to walk again, and when you do that for me I will do everything for you. Lots of things like that. And then obviously the sadness, the crying, the tears.

And I also reflected on the good things, because I’m a Christian, so I was thanking God for saving my life. Because I could have died, right, and then all of this wouldn’t have ensued.

And I think that was the first time I started to be in touch with my own voice. I mean, hearing myself, I guess. You know, the last couple of years before the accident I was so focused, busy at work, I didn’t have time to hear my own voice.

Kevin Pho: Sure.

Olivia Ong: I mean, I didn’t even have time to go to the bathroom, let alone my own voice, you know, it’s one of those things, right? So yeah, it gives me a chance to get to know myself better, see the darkness, the dark side, and also the good side in me, I guess, in the experience.

Kevin Pho: You said you spent three years in San Diego at the spinal cord injury recovery center. Give us a little glimpse about what your life was like there during that time.

Olivia Ong: Yeah, I just want to probably touch on the first time I went into the gym. I mean, I’ve been to America quite a lot of times as a tourist, but obviously this time I had one goal in mind, which was to walk again. And this place is not your usual kind of rehab place.

The moment I entered the gym, there was upbeat music, there were trainers with people with spinal cord injuries just bantering, as if they were good friends. So I think obviously, as an Australian, I’ll be like, well, that’s a big shock, because for us we’re not like that, unfortunately. So that was the thing, the camaraderie between the trainers and the clients. I felt a positive vibe the moment I went in.

So every day I worked out at Project Walk five hours each day, Monday to Friday, so quite intensive. So I would work out for a few hours in the morning and a few hours in the afternoon, and I’d just hang out at Starbucks. I mean, there’s nowhere else, I’d hang out at Starbucks or eat sushi or Costco, that was kind of my life then. And nothing wrong with Starbucks, I love Mocha Frappuccino still very much.

And yeah, so that was essentially my life Monday to Fridays. And then on the weekends I’d hang out with the other clients with spinal cord injuries, and sometimes the trainers would invite us for lunch or dinner, we’d hang out. So I had a really rich life of friendships, new friendships that I never thought that I would ever make.

It’s quite interesting, I’ll be exercising on the bike and the person next to me will be like some guy from Mexico who used to be in a cartel. I know, it’s like you never would expect things like, you’re working out next to a cartel guy. I mean, that’s how he got his injury, he was shot in the back by another rival member, or that’s what he tells me. And I’m like, OK, that’s interesting.

So I met very interesting people. And then there was a few others who have very interesting life stories. And yeah, so I think that was amazing, and I’ll never forget them. These people helped me find myself in a way, the trainers, the clients.

Kevin Pho: Yeah, so that aspect of community and that social aspect is certainly, I’m sure, so powerful. And not only I’m sure did they help you get through difficult times, but you also helped them get through difficult times. And I’m sure that people recovering from a spinal cord injury, not only is it challenging but it is also a lengthy recovery as well.

Olivia Ong: Yeah. I just want to talk a bit about the spinal cord injury itself. I did learn about it, because I started my first year of physiatry or rehabilitation medicine training when the accident happened. So I knew what spinal cord injury, the rehab bit at least, entails. But until you live through it yourself it’s a different story.

Because I realized that, oh, bladder and bowels, like, such a topic, but stuff that I had to kind of learn to manage on my own. There’s been awkward moments where I had accidents and my husband kind of had to help, awkward moments like that. But we both navigated through that. And my friends in Project Walk have been through their own dramas and stories about it, and they share their experiences as well, so I’m not alone there.

And I think for me the most devastating bit was the fact that I couldn’t walk. I mean, I could relearn to manage my bladder, my bowels, but the fact that I couldn’t walk at the point in time when I started Project Walk was what really angered me, or made me sad the most. But now that I’ve relearned to walk again, I spent three years there and I relearned to walk, and I’m very grateful for that.

But yeah, I have to admit that once I’d been through the experience of the spinal injury, the physiatry exams weren’t that hard, because the questions they ask is like, oh, this person with spinal cord injury went through this problem, or this person with brain injury went through that problem. And I’m like, yeah, I kind of know how to answer this without reading the textbook.

So I think that’s a very unique perspective of, you know, everything that we’ve been through in life, there’s always wisdom and learnings from it. So that was my wisdom and learning from that experience with the spinal injury.

Kevin Pho: So after you recovered, you mentioned you took the physiatry boards. What are you doing now? Tell us about how you’re doing today.

Olivia Ong: Well, at the moment I’m currently writing my memoir, so I’m really excited about it. I’m doing a lot of speaking, I’m quite passionate about burnout and doctors’ well-being, so I’m doing a lot of speaking and coaching and mentoring in that area. So I’m really excited.

And yeah, I’m still working as a rehabilitation and pain physician. And the reason why I’m still doing a lot of pain medicine work is because of my experience in Project Walk. I lost two friends in Project Walk from an accidental opioid overdose. So they were taking opioids and a few other medications, which devastated me, because I knew these two people, they were very young, they were in their 20s.

And I told myself, if I can make a difference in the future in the medical world, I will want to do pain medicine, because this is, I can help people like that. And that’s how I ended up doing another set of board exams, as crazy as it sounds, in pain medicine. And I’m still practicing as a pain medicine physician as well.

Now I’m really enjoying my practice and helping more and more people through persistent pain and managing it as best as they can. So I have a full life right now. I’ve got two young kids, and that probably keeps me busy as it is already.

Kevin Pho: Yeah. So tell us how your experience learning how to walk again, how does that influence how you take care of patients today?

Olivia Ong: Yeah, because I’ve been through that lived experience, now I’m a lot more patient with my patients. I used to be very abrupt before my accident, because I had a lot of work to do, so I was very abrupt with patients. Now, having been through a spinal injury, I will take the time to listen.

And I think sometimes that’s all patients really want from us, is just to spend a little bit extra time listening to them, and also asking about what really matters to them. I don’t think, not that we don’t want to do that, we don’t have the time as physicians to do that. So I think that’s really key.

So I think that’s one of the things I learned from my experience, would be compassionate listening or empathetic listening. And the other thing was to, I guess, have a better understanding of where they’re coming from, rather than just treating them as a diagnosis, as a medical issue to deal with. It’s more seeing them as a human being, not, I guess, as a diagnosis or problem to solve.

Kevin Pho: And you mentioned that you’re a speaker and a coach as well. So tell us the lessons that you want to pass on to people that you coach, that you learned from your journey.

Olivia Ong: Yeah, because I think throughout my journey to walk again I had to coach myself through it. How, about my own mindset, how I could shift that to kind of relearn to walk again. Because it’s not easy, because every day you don’t know what you expect, and you may kind of end up being as good as you get, which is not much progress. So I had to coach myself through it.

So I think the mantra or statement I want to impart to the audience will be, you are your own best coach. Literally, you have the abilities in you to coach yourself through it, amidst hard times, even growth times, good times, when you’re growing, that’s the good times. So yeah, definitely, you are your own best coach and you are your own best healer. Those are the two main learning points that I’ve gained from my own experience and as a coach right now.

Kevin Pho: We’re talking to Olivia Ong. She’s a pain and rehabilitation medicine physician in Australia. Today’s KevinMD article is “The first time I walked again after a spinal cord injury.” Olivia, as always, we’ll end with your take-home messages that you want to leave with the KevinMD audience.

Olivia Ong: Yeah, I think my take-home message will be, just be your own best friend. As simple as it sounds, I know intellectually it sounds really easy but hard to do. But I think that’s the message. No matter what happens, you listen to your own voice, your own inner voice, and be your own best friend.

Kevin Pho: Olivia, once again thank you so much for sharing your story, time, and insight, and thanks again for coming back on the show.

Olivia Ong: All right, thank you for having me again.